Monthly Archives: December 2009

Verb: Hate

Since I am spending way too much time thinking about love I should write about hate. Hate is less painful to me now, ironically.

Raw hate. It’s a strong word; many people recoil when you say it sounds like they hate something. “I don’t hate anything,” they say, in what is assumed to be a good Christian posture to love thy neighbor and thy enemy – doubly so if they’re the same.

Others just don’t like people to believe something can dig into their heart, their brain that much to illicit such a strong, dark, murky, burdensome feeling.


It’s easy to hate evil. It’s harder to hate the smaller things of life that others might call peeves. If you add up your peeves though, you can get a good dose of hate together. Small things can and do grow from their bitter seeds to bitter hate.

It is best, I’ve found, to let hate go through rage. To let violence in your head dissipate through action. But only at the inanimate, which can absorb feeling because whatever it is has none of its own. To let violence transfer to the animate, to the living, is to weigh further your burden with the disease of cowardice. That is unforgivable and needs a cure much more than hate, which just needs a direction and an outlet and can be a force for good as its exiting suction pulls the evil out.

Kids say, “I hate you” to their parents. Yet kids are often deemed the epitome of innocence. Which I would agree with. So their feelings of hate are just as valid as their feelings of confusion, love, greed and pouting self-pity. In fact when we say they’re innocent we are usually saying they have a disregard for sin because they do not know what is sinful. (Truly though, the Bible says the Lord hateth these things (“sin” Proverbs 6:16–19) so where does that put the conundrum?)

I resolve this day
To do all in my power to resist evil and to do good.
To fulfill all the responsibilities of my state in life faithfully.
To observe kindness and honesty in all contacts with my fellowmen.
To preserve complete purity of soul.
If I should be tempted to evil, I will repeat in my heart the words, “Do what is right; Be right; Be cheerful!”

I kinda don’t like that quote. But I sure don’t hate it.
OK, lunch break over.

POEM – The Peace of Wild Things by Wendell Berry


When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.

— Wendell Berry

Though this poem is helpful to me, too I made a poster of this for a restless girl I know, threw it it with bottles of Christmas Absolut and Hpnotiq. And a few other things. Here’s the poster, OK for 20 minutes work on Christmas Eve as I headed out of work (I was already off the clock)

New Music – Bought At Stinkweeds

Last week I went crazy buying music. Overdue to find new music. Bought a few bands I’ve never heard of to keep the discovery edge on. I also bought locally at Stinkweeds, which as well as just being in the middle of so much used CDs and vinyl and new CDs just keeps the tax local.

Also bought with a local Arizona / Phoenix flavor.

Sarah McLachlan – Solace (USED gave as present)
White Rabbits – It’s Frightening (gave as present)
Raveonettes – In and Out of Control (gave as present)
Bright Eyes – Noise Floor (rarities 1998-2005)
Kinch – Advances (AZ)
Kinch – Collars and Sleeves (AZ)
Love Me Nots – Detroit (AZ)
Various – Americopa Mantle Volume 1 (AZ) (with Before Braille, The Ruby Lee, The Go Reflex, Black Feet, Awake & Alert, Rajiv Patel, Sweet Bleeders, Not Quite Bernadette, and Wonderful Wednesday) 16 tracks
Boys and Frogs – In Desperate Need of a Car Crash (AZ)
Barsuk Record Treats 2010 (free sampler from Seattle record label) (Blunt Mechanic, Phantogram, Rocky Votolato, Pearly Gate Music, David Bazan, Ramona Falls, Starlight Mints, Viva Voce, Mates of State, The Wooden Birds, Say Hi, and Ra Ra Riot) 17 tracks
The Meteors – Anagram Singles Collection
Various – Punk Goes Acoustic 2 (USED 2007) (with Jack’s Mannequin, The Audition, +44, Daphne Loves Derby, Say Anything, Alesana, All Time Low, Silverstein, The All-American Rejects, Mayday Parade, The Spill Canvas, Relient K, Anti-Flag, Sherwood, and Set Your Goals) (15 tracks)
Band of Skulls – baby darling doll face honey (great title ;-) )
Passion Pit – Manners
The Bravery – Stir the Blood
Lissie – Why You Runnin’
M.I.A. – Kala (USED) (gave as present)

My goal along the way changed from planning to burn songs on blank CDs to planning to burn them all to help fill up a Nano. … But 1 I started to do it late and then some CDs would not import easily or quickly. This is likely due to an overworked CD player in my iBook more than anything else.

I also have borrowed a 1 TB harddrive and so am keeping all music on there.

So many songs, so much music. I ended up with about 400 songs on the Nano from songs I already had. I was only able to burn the White Rabbits, Love Me Nots and Surfside IV (given to me by band member’s wife after show)

Twitter Remote Blog Widget

The Code I need to put somewhere else.

Joined Mpix Today

Picture 11

Joined Mpix today because I’ve heard so many good things about them. I hope to put Christmas and this site together for good.

Found out about them through Twitter –

No one in my family reads my blog, but this may end up on my Facebook feed?

Legal Download – Music, Minibosses

I have a feeling some of these links may disappear quickly even though they ARE on the bands official site.

Minibosses– they are an active band that still tours and were at Modified Arts yesterday.

Book I Ordered – The Genesis of Modern Horseracing

I just ordered a $55 book for Christmas for a person I’ve never met. It’s Eclipse by Nicholas Cree. (Nice reviews here and here)

Why bought? This person – older retirement age – has let a person I know live at his house for at least seven months. He wasn’t there for most of it. She’s a strong friend. I wouldn’t have got anything probably except he’s interested – very – in horse racing. He goes betting, he’s got horse posters and art on his walls and I think he was a former (or current?) racehorse owner.

This book is a solid natural. Hardcover. I had to order used because its not in stock that I could find on online retailers.

World AIDS DAY poster

Posing in the hallway at work with a simple photo I created for a friend whose mother died of AIDS in 2000

Posing in the hallway at work with a simple poster I created for a friend whose mother died of AIDS in 2000

* Note I did back date this entry. Actually published Dec. 3